"(which is the first commandment with promise)"
Ephesians 6:2
SINCE Luke was Paul's closest companion at the time when this letter was written, the two must surely have discussed together the story of the Boy Jesus which Luke incorporated in his Gospel, and they must have marvelled at His simple submission to Joseph and Mary. Let nobody think that this was easy for the twelve-year-old Jesus. It must have been a matter of real cost to our Saviour to abandon the exciting atmosphere of the Rabbinical schools where He could so excel, and accept instead the discipline and drudgery of the carpenter's shop in Nazareth. Nevertheless He accepted the orders of Mary and Joseph without demur. He honoured those who acted as His human parents, and in so doing He brought greater honour to His heavenly Father.
NONE of us know whether Mary's insistence that Jesus should return to Nazareth with her and Joseph was the right decision. We do know this, though, that the Lord Himself never questioned the rightness of His obedience to it. So we see that the matter of obedience to parents belongs to both the Old Testament and the New. As always, the Law and the Lord Jesus are in perfect harmony. What is more, both offer a blessing to the obedient.
DIFFICULT as it may sometimes be for an adolescent to submit to imperfect parents, he or she will be showing a Christlike Spirit by so doing. And it follows that they will get a blessing. The actual nature of the promise is not stated here in the New Testament; Paul simply draws our attention to the fact that there must be something special about this commandment, for it is the first (and the only) one to specify a reward for those who keep it.
POSSIBLY this commandment is singled out from among the rest because it involves that filial attitude of heart which is so preciously found in full expression in the relationship between the Lord Jesus and His heavenly Father. God merits our respect, for His fatherly love is full of understanding and kindness. That this is not always so in the case of earthly parents only makes submission an even greater virtue and the more pleasing to God. Not that this excuses parents if they fail to do their part. They must seek to earn their children's respect rather than to demand it, as the subsequent verses show.
SCRIPTURE balances Scripture. This commandment must not be allowed to set aside the divine decree that marriage changes things for a man, for with it he must make a break with the old order. "For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife" (Matthew 19:5). That a man should forsake his parents to enter into a close union with his wife is a basic principle of human life, dating from the beginning and confirmed by the Lord Jesus Himself. It can only be ignored with unhappy consequences.
SENTIMENTALISTS wax eloquent about the beauty of patriarchal establishments and they flourished all over the world throughout the ages. They do not represent God's ideal for man. He wants new families to begin rather than that old existing ones should extend to swallow up and stultify further generations. The new husband and wife have mutual obligations which modify this commandment, though they do not nullify it. For some this makes it difficult to know just how to maintain a right relationship with parents. The Spirit-taught adult will be guided as to how to honour parents without being wrongly subservient towards them. They can always enjoy the special promise spoken of in this parenthesis if they balance Scripture with Scripture.
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